Saturday, January 24, 2009 Y
Dear, this is another post about unhappy things, I really feel sad tat I dun really have the chance to post happy things up. Recently I got a very strong six sense that we gonna break off soon, I dun know why, and i think I got no confident and heart to save it anymore, I am really tire this time round, if we really do argue again, i think i will let go everything le.. still rem I did ask u one time do u love me as much as before? u reply me a quick wan "No" actually my heart very pain.. And I think I also slowly get numb about our relationship already.. we really argue every single thing.. even u buy something for my family new year, suppose to be I am glad and happy u bought something for us, but turn into a bad ending..
I got something to sound out here as I always keep from u, sorry that u should know my drive is high, yes u dun like it everytime, even dirty joke, u feel sick too when I say it to u, so I really swear to myself I will never ask from um say infront of u, or even mention anything about that. My every guy fren, their gf give whenever they need, even when their gf dun wish to do, they blow for them.. I know u dun like, so I also dun wanna force u, I dun know is coz u haven mature or u dun like to have sex or u feel that I am sick, so u feel disgust when doing with me..
To me I truley believe no sex no love.. I still confidently stand my right.
Dear.. I think maybe sometime I dun wanna do extra things for u is because I think our relationship dun last long anymore and the feeling towards love had faded inside me, I believe same goes to u. I can really sense u start to fade also.. sometime when u sms me telling me u miss me lots.. I got not much feeling, I feel that u say for the sake of saying only.. When the time u are not able to acc me I feel very ache inside me.. u really dun spend enough time with me, and slowly I attempted and I think I find tat when I am alone, I am more happy..
So if we were to argue, I think I may choose to let go, short pain better than long pain, u will be more happy too trust me.. Every night always before I slp in my bunk when u unable to chat long with me, I always look at the picture we took long time ago.. I really see the sweet in us.. I love it.. and whenever I think through, my eye turn red.. I feel like crying and my heart really ache, why does our relationship turn into this way? we use to promise what to each other and plan what to buy and do in the future had slowly turn into a dream only..
Dear kola, if 1 day we really break off, I will be very sad trust me, but I hope u wun get upset too long too k? u will be fine after few week, and I hope u will be more happy and fortune when u get another bf, hope he can give what i can't give to u.. I had tried my best already.. sorry..
{{ 9:26 PM -
Purple&&Freak `
